Skip to main content

5th December, 2024: Month 6

It has been six months since we’ve been apart, but it feels like an eternity. Time moves unbearably slow, and we still have 550 days to go before we can be together again. I count each passing day in pain, yet the clock refuses to move any faster.Some days, I wish I could fast-forward time; other days, I fantasize about leaving everything behind and moving to him. But my responsibilities keep me bound here, leaving me helpless, waiting and longing.

Oh, how I yearn to hold him just once more. At this point, I would give up anything and everything for that single embrace. I miss him so profoundly that no words can ever capture the depth of my longing. 

Well, November until today has been quite dramatic. I didn’t hear from him for two days, from the 10th to the 11th of November, and it turned out he had lost his phone, again! My god, he is so careless. This is the second time he has lost his phone, and the third time he has misplaced something important. First, he lost his headphone, then his phone twice, and now his earbuds all in the same month.

I had to scold him when he lost the earbuds because his carelessness worries me. But I don’t like doing it, I have to harden my heart just to say those words, and it hurts, especially knowing everything he has been through and is still going through. Yet, every time something like this happens, my mind spirals into bad thoughts and a thousand worst-case scenarios. I suppose it’s normal to feel this way when you’re far from each other, but the emotions can be cruel. The worry and fear that something terrible has happened are overwhelming.

I finally heard from him on the 13th, and apparently, he had left his phone at work and couldn’t find it. This led to an argument with his manager, who had been changing his shifts at his own convenience, which really pissed him off. He’s fiery, but I just want him to keep a cool head.

Speaking of his carelessness, he also managed to cut his finger on the 22nd of November. Sometimes, he takes my breath away with how reckless he is. Oh, I really hope he becomes more responsible and careful. 

To make matters worse, his internet data expired on the 24th, and he wasn’t able to recharge it until the 29th so we hadn't been able to keep in touch much as usual. I’ve been telling him to manage his finances better, but he never listens. The thing is, he’s been sending money to his family, making sure they’re taken care of while barely keeping enough for himself. He’s so selfless, and honestly, that’s one of the things I love about him. But I just wish he would learn to take care of himself too.

Well, we had our sixth fight on November 30th, and we didn’t talk until December 2nd. Those few days felt tough with no texts, no calls, no knowing what he was up to. I kept catching myself wanting to text him or checking my phone, hoping to see his message. It’s always been like that.

The emotions got the best of me, especially since we had already been struggling to stay in touch because of everything going on. The silence between us felt heavier than the fight itself. Every time something like this happens, I pray it won’t happen again. I don’t like fighting with him because, at the end of the day, I love him. More than anything, I just want to make him happy.

Signing Out, 

Day 180 of Our LDR.

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Celebrating One Year of LDR Journey

  They say distance separates hearts, but I think ours just learned to beat louder. Today marks one full year of being in a long-distance relationship, 365 days of holding on, showing up, and proving that love doesn’t shrink with space; it stretches, adapts, and if you're lucky, it deepens. What once felt impossible is now something we’ve lived, and are still living, one day, one call, one “goodnight” at a time. I still think about that day at the airport. The way your hand slipped out of mine. The tears neither of us wanted to let fall. The ache I carried through,  that was Day One, the beginning of this strange, beautiful, often frustrating chapter. We didn’t know if we’d last. But here we are. A year later. Stronger, closer, and even more in love. This year taught us that love doesn’t always come in fireworks or fairy tale moments. It comes in the little things. Your sleepy morning voice notes were my daily shot of warmth. My late-night texts full of memes became your las...
Post a Comment
Read more

Cheers to 5 Years of Us!

Today marks five beautiful years of our journey together. Looking back, I’m truly thankful for everything we’ve poured into this relationship, the laughter, the tears, the love, and even the lessons. It hasn’t always been easy, but here we are, still choosing each other. And I hope we’ll continue to do so for the rest of our lives. Life isn’t like the perfect love stories we see in TikTok, K-Dramas or BL series. Real love is messy, raw, and honest. It’s a balance of both sunshine and storms. It starts with that giddy, butterfly-filled puppy love, fooling around, sharing silly jokes, and feeling like the world is brighter just because you’re together. But it also comes with disagreements, hurt feelings, and moments of doubt. Love, I’ve learned, isn’t about avoiding those hard times but about standing side by side and working through them. It takes two people, equally committed, to make it last. A friend once told me, “The first seven years of a relationship are the hardest with constant...
Post a Comment
Read more

Thinley's bucket list

A few months ago, completely out of the blue, Thinley sent me his bucket list. Rereading it now, given everything we're going through, it feels like a collection of faraway dreams. There are moments when I truly don't know if we'll pull through this challenging time, but my heart desperately wants us to. We have to. His list, simply titled "Things I Want to Do With My Husband," holds the most beautiful and uncomplicated desires: a nice date, dinner, a movie, a visit to a Lhakhang, and traveling (just the two of us). These are such simple things, the kind we often take for granted in the rush of everyday life. It truly speaks to the pure, childlike heart that Thinley has. Despite the uncertainty that looms over us, I cling to the hope that we can make every single item on that list come true. It might not be exactly as we once imagined, or on the timeline we expected, but I am committed to finding a way. Here’s how I envision us completing his precious bucket list....
Post a Comment
Read more